In past summers around this time I’d be part of a team scripting and rehearsing for Front Page Follies, an East Tennessee gridiron show making fun of local, state, and national politicos all for the benefit of journalism scholarships. Follies has been gone for almost two years now, a victim of budget issues—and any revival has been delayed by the COVID-19 pandemic.

Nevertheless, humor remains an important coping method in crises. Thus, I’m sharing with all of you a satirical song variation, one can do at home or on Zoom with friends. Let’s start with this simple solo item you likely will recognize:

Once upon a time you dressed so fine
A Batman villain in your prime, didn't you?
People call, say "Beware guy, you're bound for jail"
You thought they were all kiddin' you
You used to laugh about
Everybody who was pleadin’ out
Now you don't dress so loud
Now you don't seem so proud
About having to be wearing prison orange
 
How does it feel?
How does it feel?
To be Trump’s Roy Cohn?
Paul Manafort’s clone?
Like a Roger Stone?

Ahh, you've been election fixin’, ever since the time of Nixon

But you know you only used to get half your due
Nobody's ever taught you not to perjure or to cheat

Now you're off to prison with a Tricky Dick tattoo

You say you never compromised

With the White House tramp, but have you realized

He's got his own shaky alibis

As you stare into the vacuum of his eyes

And say do you want a pardon deal?
How does it feel, how does it feel?

To be at Club Fed; forty months it’s said

A complete disown, like a Roger Stone