So I'm sipping my coffee and minding my own bidness this morning, reading my e-mail and listening to classical music out on my back deck. It's sunny and a light breeze is wafting the fragrance of my Casablanca lily across the yard. Then I come upon this mass-forwarded email from somebody named Lowdog:

" TIME FOR A FEW FACTS!!
>
> BETCHA' DIDN'T KNOW THIS?
>
>
>
> PILOT CINDY McCAIN
>
>
>
> Maybe she can talk her husband out of supporting General Aviation user
> fees.
>
>
>
> This is an interesting article as not much was known about her. She
> was on Leno the other night and it was an interesting interview. It turns
> out that she is a character as she is or has been a race car driver and is
> also a pilot. She flies John around the country to his rallies. After
> hearing that about her and reading this I now have a lot of respect for
> her.
>
>
>
> Election 2008: Cindy Hensley McCain has been disparaged as a trophy
> wife, a Barbie, an heiress with fancy purses, even the Paris Hilton of
> politics. But there's more to the picture than meets the eye.
>
>
>
> Yes, Mrs. McCain is the perfectly coiffed blonde standing d dutifully
> behind the senator during his speeches. And yes, she wears stylish clothing
> and carries a Prada purse. And it's true she doesn't say much. But feminist
> critics who write her off as a 'stand-by-your-man' shrinking violet are
> selling her short. In many ways, Cindy McCain stacks up sturdier than
> Hillary Clinton or Michelle Obama. And she'd make a more impressive first
> lady.
>
>
>
> Mrs. McCain: More than meets the eye.
>
>
>
> While Obama's wife has been hating America, complaining about the war
> and undermining our troops serving in Afghanistan, McCain's wife has been
> worrying about her sons who actually are fighting or planning to fight in
> the war on terror. One, in fact, was until a few months ago deployed in Iraq
> during some of the worst violence. You don't hear the McCain's talk about
> it, but their 19-year-old Marine, Jimmy, is preparing for his second tour
> of duty. Their 21-year-old son, Jack, is poised to graduate from Annapolis
> and also could join the Marines as a second lieutenant. The couple made the
> decision not to draw attention to their sons out of respect for other
> families with sons and daughters in harm's way.
>
>
>
> Cindy also says she doesn't want to risk falling apart on the campaign
> trail talking about Jimmy who was so young when he enlisted she had to sign
> consent forms for his medical tests before he could report for duty and
> potentially upsetting parents of soldiers who are serving or have been
> killed.
>
>
>
> The McCain's want to make sure their boys get no special treatment.
> Same goes for their five other children, including a daughter they adopted
> from Bangladesh. During a visit to Mother Teresa's orphanage there, Cindy
> noticed a dying baby. The orphanage could not provide the medical care
> needed to save her life. So she brought the child home to America for the
> surgery she desperately needed. The baby is now their healthy, 16-year-old
> daughter, Bridget.
>
>
>
> Though all seven McCain children including two Sen. McCain adopted from
> his first marriage are supportive of their father, they prefer their privacy
> to the glare of the campaign trail. Another daughter, Meghan, 23, helps him
> behind the scenes.
>
>
>
> Cindy McCain not only cherishes her children, but also her country,
> which in an election year filled with America-bashing, is a refreshing
> novelty. She seethed when she heard Michelle Obama's unpatriotic remarks
> that she only recently grew proud of America. 'I am very proud of my
> country,' Mrs. McCain asserted.
>
>
>
> She also may be tougher than the other women in the race. While Hillary
> thinks she's come under sniper fire on mission trips abroad, Cindy has
> actually seen violence. She witnessed a boy get blown up by a mine in
> Kuwait during a trip with an international group that removes land mines
> from war-torn countries.
>
>
>
> Mrs. McCain also is a hands-on philanthropist. She sits on the board of
> Operation Smile, which arranges for plastic surgeons to fix cleft palates
> and other birth defects. She also has helped organize relief missions to
> Micronesia.
>
>
>
> During a scuba-diving vacation to the islands, Mrs. McCain took a
> friend to a local hospital to have a cut treated. She was shocked, and
> saddened, by what she saw. 'They opened the door to the OR, where the
> supplies were, and there were two cats and a whole bunch of rats climbing
> out of the sterile supplies,' she recalled. 'They had no X-ray machine, no
> beds. To me, it was devastating because it was a U.S. trust territory.' As
> soon as she returned home, she arranged for medical equipment and teams of
> doctors to be sent to treat the island children.
>
>
>
> Michelle Obama may contribute to CARE, which fights global poverty and
> works to empower poor women.
>
> Cindy sits on its board.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Who's the out-of-touch elitist?
>
> Low Dog

>
> "In God we Trust''

I just HAD to answer this one, so I wrote up a response and hit "Send All." My servers decided to reject it. So, just to get it out of my system, I'm posting all this here. My blood pressure's probably higher than ol' Cindy's this morning -- maybe she's a Betty Ford in the making, but I have my doubts.

OK, I didn't ask for this e-mail, and do not know why anybody would send it to me.

But I read it, and notice that there are a few "facts" about the beer heiress Cindy McCain that are left out:

Instead of pasting them here, I'll post the Snopes.com citation:

http://www.snopes.com/politics/mccain/cindy.asp

And here is a pretty good overview of her drug-related crimes:

http://www.salon.com/news/feature/1999/10/18/drugs/

Yes, Cindy McCain has done those good and interesting things mentioned in this email, but she's also done something that would have landed anyone else in prison. If I weren't so old and so jaded, I'd be shocked that the Republicans are so eager to slime Michelle Obama that they'd voluntarily open this door this door into Cindy Mac's closet, but open it they have. From her snagging a married man away from his severely injured wife to stealing drugs from her "charity," she's got enough skeletons in that closet to make Bill Clinton blush.

If Michelle Obama had done half this crap, you Republicans would have beaten her to a bloody pulp. This one's going to backfire on you.