The latest mad shooter was felled by an armed security guard at the megachurch in Colorado Springs founded by the Rev. Ted Haggar. Her swift action was lauded for possibly saving many more lives.

I suppose it just makes sense to have security services when dealing with crowd control in such a large business church but what a creepy feeling to think about it.

From the new church bulletin:

Worshippers should plan to arrive at least two hours before morning services.

Golden Pass Holders (with implanted microchips) may proceed through portal B.

Or maybe Garrison Keillor had the answer a few years ago with a plan to let you worship from the safety of your own home.

Lutherans on Line (opens in Real Player)