Last night, MSNBC's Countdown featured an Ode to Sean Hannity, composed by none other than Monty Python's John Cleese. To whit:
Ode to Sean Hannity
by John CleeseAping urbanity
Oozing with vanity
Plump as a manatee
Faking humanity
Journalistic calamity
Intellectual inanity
Fox Noise insanity
You're a profanity
Hannity
I was inspired. Results after the break.
It might be fun to get Hannity and John Cleese in a debate.
I'm actually thinking of the cheese shop sketch, with Cleese as the customer and Hannity as the shopkeeper.
"So, this news network is 'fair and balanced', I see."
"Yes, sir."
"Very good."
"You don't mind the constant news ticker crawl at the bottom of the screen, do you?"
"Oh, no, I delight in all forms of information gathering."
"Eh?"
"I likes to read the news. Do you have prominent Democratic politicians?"
"No, they're all in caucus today."
"I see. Aggressive liberals to counterbalance forceful conservatives?"
"The leopard ate them all."
"Pity, that. Venezuelan Hugo Chavez supporters?"
"All the airports are snowed in."
"And on such a lovely July day. Guest appearances by Moore?"
"Coming up next!"
"Really? I'd fancy to meet him."
"Her, sir."
"Her? Michael Moore would seem to be of the masculine persuasion."
"Oh, I thought you meant Julianne Moore. She's going to be discussing her next movie."
"I can hardly say I'm surprised. STOP RUNNING THAT BLOODY NEWS TICKER! Opponents of the Iraq War?"
"We've not found any."
"But... but... there's a major protest march just a block away!"
"We weren't invited."
"Well, that's a certainly stopped many a fine news organization in the past. Tell me, do you actually have any fair and balanced coverage at all?"
"Oh, yes sir."
"Then please, show it to me."
"We... no sir, there's none at all. We've been deliberately deceiving the American public for years now."
"What a senseless waste of cable television bandwidth."
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Ah, sorry, the cat's made off with it.
Liberty and justice for all.
My home
The leopard was my take on that.
I'm leaving it to someone else to start jokes about the McCainish inquisition (which no one expects, of course.)
Ode to Sarah Palin
by Carole Borges
Myopic beauty Queen pretty
Spouting Joe six-pack inanity
Pumping her AKA in her snow machine buggy
Faking civility
Winking obsessively
Scanning the morning sky for Ruskies
Skinning moose on the terrace in silk panties
Dropping babies between lunch hour tasties
Slyly pretending idiocy
You're a calamity Sarah Palin
But for sure you'll go down in history